Hell, let’s play a whole season.
Here are the teams. They play in little bucolic ballparks. No DH.
New York Bryants
Hartford Greenleaf Whittiers
New Jersey Ginsbergs
New England Frost
New Jersey Williams
New York Moores
Iowa City Grahams
Baseball Poetry Commissioner: the honorable Harold Bloom
Player Union Rep: Camille Paglia
There are still some hold-outs, most notably W.H. Auden from the Ashberys.
Scouting Report Highlights:
The brawling Philadelphia Poe features Lord Byron in the clean-up spot and Alexander Pope does mound duties as the ace of a pitching staff not afraid to throw inside.
The elegant New York Bryants have Abraham Lincoln as their chief twirler and the slugging Thomas Cole hitting no. 4 in a highly distinguished lineup.
The Hartford Greenleaf Whittiers bring William Lloyd Garrison as their ace and Charles Dickens just signed up to play centerfield.
The Cambridge Longfellows have Washington Irving roaming center and Dante and Horace as mound aces.
The Boston Lowells field Mark Twain at short, Robert Browning in left, and Charles Eliot Norton and Leigh Hunt as their dominant hurlers.
Beware the Concord Emersons: William James is their ace, Swedenborg bashes from the cleanup spot, and Thoreau tends centerfield.
The Brooklyn Ashberys have Frank O’Hara leading off and Andy Warhol is their ace. Kenneth Koch and James Tate anchor the infield, while Charles Bernstein is in the bullpen.
The Ginsbergs of New Jersey have William Blake slugging from the No. 4 hole, Charles Bukowski and Bob Dylan as their double play combination and Mark Van Doren and William Burroughs on the mound.
The Tennessee Ransoms have Allen Tate at catcher and Cleanth Brooks, Robert Penn Warren, I.A. Richards, and Paul Engle on the hill.
Rounding out the National League, we have the Maine Millays with Edmund Wilson and Philip Sidney pitching, with Sappho out in center.
The Brooklyn Whitmans have Oscar Wilde and F.O. Matthiessen as no. 1 and no. 2 starters, with Lawrence Fernlinghetti, C.K. Williams and William Michael Rossetti providing up-the-middle defense at second, short, and center.
The New England Frost have William Wordsworth in the clean-up spot with Louis Untermeyer as their no. 1 hurler.
The London Eliots have Bertrand Russell and Lady Ottoline Morrell on the mound with Tristan Corbiere at first, Jules LaForgue at third, and Arthur Symons behind the plate.
The Rapallo Pound are stocked, with Benito Mussollini in right, Hugh Kenner on the mound and Ernest Fenollosa at shortstop. Negotiations are continuing with Joyce, Yeats, and Duchamp.
The New Jersey Williams have Man Ray as their ace and Robert Creeley in the lead-off spot. They also want Duchamp.
The Hartford Stevens have pitching depth with George Santayana, Helen Vendler, and John Hollander. James Merrill is in the clean-up spot.
The New York Moores have Elizabeth Bishop at the top of the lineup and Pater in the bullpen. Ted Hughes is their big slugger.
The Cambridge Cummings have Picasso batting no. 3 and Scofield Thayer and T.E. Hulme anchoring the pitching staff.
The Amherst Emily has Thomas Wentworth Higginson as their pitching ace with Alfred Tennyson, Charlotte Bronte and Elizabeth Barrett in the outfield.
Finally, the Iowa City Grahams have Bin Ramke and Peter Sacks as key pitchers and James Galvin powering the middle of the lineup.